Placebo Performance

Fast is easy. Buy a street legal turbo kit, and some big brakes. There it is: You go fast, you stop fast. End of story. Already have a turbo? No problem. Add more boost, a bigger exhaust and some more fuel. Done. Oh, and you might want to upgrade those brakes.


Like I said, fast is easy. Anyone can do it. Sure there are some subtleties here and there, but you get the idea. One of the main reasons people don't go as fast as they want is that they mess about with things that don't add fast. Sometimes they even take away from the overall power of the car. So what follows is the offensive list of things that you shouldn't do to your performance machine.

Offenders
BODY KITS: Now, aero kits have their place. They can keep air out from under the car, and make it stick to the road better. And those big wings on the back can add some serious downforce. But here is the thing: All of that blocking of air and diverting of air and moving air around takes power. The air does not move out of your way on its own, and here is the catch: The power is coming from your engine. What is worse is that most of the benefits of body kits are not seen until over about 50 mph; and, since most kids are drag racing from light to light in the city, it's all over at about 60 mph. Sure they look cool—or not, in some cases—but if your cool looking car gets spanked by a plain-Jane four-door Civic, be prepared to be the butt of many jokes.

There is a reason racecars don't have a sick sound system.
GIANT RIMS, DROPPED SUSPENSION: Your car has to drive on city streets just like the rest of us. So why did you add 35 series tires with hardly any sidewall? Do you like getting a flat every time you brush against a pothole? Is it fun bending those $1000-a-piece rims?


The suspension and tires on your car are there to absorb bumps. If you are driving on a silky smooth road course all the time, then drop it down. However, in my residence of Anytown, USA, the roads are more like the leg of a rally course. And I like to drive fast all the time. While you're slowing down for that little gutter dip, I'm adding throttle and drifting right across it. Make sure your suspension matches the roads that you really drive, or prepare to be slow.